XPost: rec.arts.tv, rec.arts.animation
From:
weberm@polaris.net
by Pete Delaney
On Thursday, April 19, 1990 in Room SH-216 in the Capitol building,
Senator Joseph Biden of Maryland called to order that rarest of
Congressional events - a special joint hearing of similar committees of
both the House and Senate.
"Today we will see unveiled here the newest weapon in our fight against
drugs. This new weapon is not a Naval carrier group or a new prison. It
isn't a one billion dollar research program for cocaine-eating
caterpillars. It is something more powerful than any of those things. It
is a cartoon.
"The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are a well-known group of individuals
among 8-year-olds, and you know the powerful impact of those turtles,
along with figures like Bugs Bunny and Winnie the Pooh and the Smurfs,
and Alf, who have all had impacts upon our children, and this is a chance
for their impact to be very positive. In my opinion, Cartoon All-Stars to
The Rescue is the single most ambitious and important drug education
program ever attempted."
"Even if it sounds silly, cartoons may be able to beat the drug cartels
with our young. If the Ninja Turtles and the Pooh bear all do their part,
we can prevent this generation of children from becoming the next
generation of drug addicts. This joint effort is what we are about to
learn today."
Thus, with firm idealistic vigor, the future Vice-president moderated a
panel of television and corporate witnesses all extolling the virtues of
a project that had been nearly four years in the making.
"Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue" would combine the talents of
television's top animation studios, the money of the McDonald's
corporation and the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences, a team of entertainment industry copyright lawyers and the technical facilities of
the Disney Corporation to create a half hour that they anticipated would
help effectively and entertainingly explain to children the perils of
substance abuse.
The project had what seemed to be a sure fire hook - a cast of nearly 20 familiar characters from Saturday morning cartoons of the late-1980s.
Unfortunately, the result would fall far short of Senator Biden's glowing predictions.
This is not to say that the program is completely without merit, and it
would be wrong to simply dismiss the film as "the Reefer Madness of the
1990s."
The initial idea was conceived in 1986 by executive directors of the
Television Academy who believed that the organization had to use it's
resources to take a strong anti-drug stance. "The problem of drug abuse
is pervasive in our society," former Academy president Richard Frank told
the hearing, "But so is television."
Wherever there is the influence of drugs, there is the influence of
television. Cartoon All-Stars To The Rescue will inform an estimated 20
million children. It will get it's message across using an entertaining
format that children favor and characters they love."
With the enthusiastic support of the Academy's Board of Governors,
agreements were made with McDonald's Children's Charities for financing,
Roy Disney of Disney Studios who would be executive producer, award
winning producer Buzz Potamkin who would be in charge of production, the broadcast, cable and foreign networks who would present the show in a
simulcast unprecedented in the history of television, and the copyright
owners of the different characters who agreed to make them available at
no cost.
Undertaking the formidable task of writing a script which not only had to
deal effectively with the substance abuse problem but also entertain a
target audience of 5-to-11 year olds was the team of Tom Swale and Duane
Poole. Modeling their script on "A Christmas Carol," Swale and Poole
utilized their all- star characters as teachers and guides as Michael,
the 14 year-old drug user at the center of the story is given a tour of
his past, present and future life to show what negative impact drugs have
and will continue to have if he continues to be a user.
Completion of the script required 6 months as suggestions of
psychologists, educators and substance abuse experts were evaluated to
insure the script's accuracy.
Animation, voice-overs, music and sound effects took eight weeks during
which time the project was able to hire George C. Scott to provide the
voice of "Smoke", an evil drug-pushing apparition. Scott only requested
Equity scale as his fee.
Howard Ashman and Alan Menken, recent Oscar winners for "Little Mermaid"
were assigned to score the program and to also create a viable anti-drug
theme song.
The show was still being edited just days before it's airing and the
Senators and Congressmen could only preview a 15 minute rough-cut devoid
of music and sound effects.
But finally, on the morning of Saturday, April 21, 1990 on CBS, NBC, ABC,
FOX, Telemundo, Univision, Disney, USA, Nickelodeon, BET, Lifetime, TBS,
TNT, AFRTS as well as stations in Canada and Mexico, the seemingly "can't
miss" anti drug cartoon was shown.
After a brief statement by President George H. W. Bush and his wife
Barbara, the show opened with the dawn of a new day in Anytown, USA.
In the bedroom where 9 year old Corey is sleeping an ominous hand reaches through the door and steals her piggy bank. We then start the crossover
hard sell as The Smurfs, Alf, Garfield, Alvin, Simon, Theodore, Winnie
The Pooh, Baby Kermit and Slimer investigate and discover Corey's teenage brother Michael in his room, cackling fiendishly over the broken bank and savoring the nearly $20 found inside. Confronted by Corey, he quickly
shoves a box containing his stash under the bed and under the noses of
Alf and The Chipmunks.
Theodore explains to the others the source of the box's funny smell, "Marijuana. An unlawful substance used to experience artificial highs."
Corey is shaken by Michael's unhealthy appearance as he storms out of the
house followed by the Cartoon All-Stars.
The fact that the show has been on for only 5 minutes and there have
already been appearances by 14 different characters illustrates a key
problem with Poole and Swale's screenplay. There is a perception that the
duo were told by the producers "Just put the characters anywhere."
It's also become obvious that these characters personalities are not
suited to the deadly subject of teen drug abuse. Throughout the show most
of the characters whine and cry "Oh my goodness." and "Oh dear." and
"Please Michael, don't." This might be a concession to the 5-to-7 segment
of the intended 5-to-11 year old audience.
Fortunately, in the next segment, the arrival of animation's greatest
character presents the show's only powerful and effective anti-drug scene
as he is the only character who fearlessly confronts Smoke, the evil
pro-drug apparition.
Smoke is a frightening, cloudy, grey ethereal Grim-Reaper in a business
suit who's face occasionally changes to a skull. Masterfully voiced by
George C. Scott, one is reminded of Scott's General Buck Turdgeson role
from Dr. Strangelove when Smoke, like Turdgeson continuously and
recklessly rationalizes his dangerous stances.
But since Bugs Bunny never took any guff from anybody, it seemed right
that the rabbit would effortlessly dump Smoke into a garbage can and over inflate him with a bicycle pump till he explodes after the villain
assured Michael that marijuana will make all his problems go "poof!".
Bugs has little patience for Michael as he refreshingly tells him that
his drug use makes him "definitely not one of the world's foremost
thinkers" and reels at the teen's assertion that he wasn`t a victim of
peer pressure when he smoked his first joint at the age of 12. "Don't
give me that old `I started because I wanted to' routine. What makes you
think they knew better than you?"
Bugs then lays it on the line in simple terms "A joint? So what's the big attraction. Look kid, everybody's got problems. Nobody ever gets
everything they want in this world. What's important is what's inside
you. You have to believe in yourself!"
A brief segway scene between a fretful Corey and her father leads to the
first of two "psychedelic mindblower" approaches to illustrating the
dangers of drugs.
Falling into a sewer, Michael encounters Michelangelo of the Mutant Ninja Turtles, and Kermit, Piggy and Gonzo from Muppet Babies who escort him
and Smoke on a wild roller-coaster ride through his decaying brain. It's
an incredible piece of frightening animation with lightning bolts, skulls
and menacing dragons combined with a great acid-rock soundtrack. "The
great ups from drugs only lead to horrible downs. Eventually you'll take
drugs just to feel normal!" Kermit warns.
Michael eventually lies helpless and alone in a city park pleading for
help. Help arrives in the form of Huey, Dewey and Louie who deliver one
of the most obvious intros for a song ever "Let's show him how to say no
to drugs!"
"Wonderful Ways To Say No" by Ashman and Menkin is an undeniably catch
ditty performed by most of the Cartoon All-Stars (including a just
arrived Tigger) that offers the following suggestions:
No way
No thanks
No dice
No sir
Those drugs are so boring
I'm training for football
Beat it
Get lost
Get out of my face with that stuff
I'll catch you guys later
I've got too much homework and it's tough
I'm late for my baseball game
I'll miss my ride
I'm allergic
It's bad for my complexion
Forget it doc
The song ends dramatically when Baby Piggy shatters the screen with a
karate kick.
Alf then makes like a wise old uncle when he pulls Michael through the
mirror of his stash box for another reality check. "Drugs are your enemy. Storming the battlements. Trying to take control." He then escorts him to
the office of the man in charge - Smoke.
This leads into the most incredible and disturbing segment of the show.
Even more wild than Michael's tour though his brain is his bad trip to a
horror themed amusement park with rotating buzz saw blades and sinister
rides with large ghastly Huey, Dewey and Louie heads. The kid then falls
into the body of a monster and encounters Tigger and Baby Piggy floating happily in it's stomach. They throw Michael a life raft that speeds him
back to the park where he crashes into exhibits and causes a flood that
engulfs the area. But it's not really a flood - it's a milk shake that
Baby Piggy is drinking. She sucks Michael up her straw, then spits him
out.
Exactly what point Swale and Poole were making here is with this is not
clear but it is a remarkable piece of animation supported by some
kick-ass electric guitar riffs.
The show heads for it's finale as Michael then consults fortune-teller
Daffy Duck about his ultimate fate. The image presented in Daffy's
crystal ball is astonishing for a kid show. In a cosmic void Michael, his
mind and body completely destroyed, lies on an alter bathed in lights
creating a cross. He shivers and shakes at the brink of death clutching a hypodermic needle in his hand. He is being crucified by drugs. If the
shows writers, producers and director were going for a "sacred-straight" approach, they certainly succeeded.
Movies and television shows tackle the subject of drug dependence with
varying degrees of success.
After a final pep talk from the Cartoon All-Stars reassures him that life
is great drug-free, Michael returns home just in time to attack Smoke who
was tempting Corey with his evil. The now reformed kid throws Smoke into
the back of a gamey garbage truck, takes Corey by the hand and the
siblings go to their parents for a heart-to-heart talk.
Critical reaction to the show was not encouraging:
"Beyond doubt, some kids got the message and will steer clear of drugs.
But there's also a chance that subjecting kids to such pro-social antics
as Huey, Dewey and Louie singing about ways to say no will plant a seed
in kids that won't always sprout in just the way it's intended.
When each child ultimately grows up to face peer pressures, boredom,
anxieties and societal expectations that can make the escape of drugs
seem so attractive, it's hard to believe many of them will be swayed by
the memory of Baby Kermit telling them `There's nothing cool about a fool
on drugs.'"
---Variety
"Scare tactics instead of getting to the roots of the drug problem. The
most vivid character is not one of the All-Stars, it's Smoke. The
one-note plot is easy to follow, but the drama is largely trivialized by
the producer's effort to keep the message simple. Even the song `Ways to
Say No' is uninspired and insipid."
---Entertainment Weekly
At the preview showing before the joint Congressional committee there was
also doubt.
"I hope this doesn't evolve into a mere self- promotion activity in which
we finally hear from Hollywood and this is the last shot. Showing this
once or twice isn't really going to change anyone's mind who's going to
use drugs."
---Representative John Conyers, Jr., (D-Michigan)
There would never be another showing of the show on television due to a threatened lawsuit by Jim Davis, creator of Garfield who claimed he was
never consulted about the use of his character.
Since the show was mainly produced for home video anyway, all involved
figured that a legal fight was not worth the effort.
With thousands of VHS tapes provided by Kodak and duplication done by
Disney Home Video, a copy of the show was sent to nearly every school,
library, civic organization and video store's free-rental shelf in the
country.
Oddly though, this free public service program could not be home
reproduced as Disney still made sure each tape was copy-guarded and had
the "home use only" warning at the beginning.
Conclusion
Maybe the road to Hell is, indeed paved with good intentions, but I
believe that everyone involved wanted to make a small dent in the drug
problem among kids of the late 1980's.
Unfortunately, grandiose predictions like Senator Biden's assertion that
the show was "the single most ambitious and important drug education
program ever attempted" now seems a bit silly, and maybe the money would
have been better spent on that naval carrier group, that new prison or
even on those cocaine-eating caterpillars.
Certainly the show had flaws, not the least of which the scene in which
Michael takes the horror trip through the amusement park - a scene which
in retrospect makes absolutely no sense.
Also, having 20 different cartoon characters together must have looked
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