From:
david.j.worrell@gmail.com
On Saturday, September 16, 2017 at 11:55:19 AM UTC-7, LowRider44M wrote:
Proof Of 'God Playing Dice With The Universe' Found In The Sun's Interior https://www.forbes.com/sites/startswithabang/2017/09/15/proof-of-god-playing-dice-with-the-universe-found-in-the-suns-interior/#1f1d3aea3b03
In the Sun,
One time out of:
10x10x10x10
10x10x10x10
10x10x10x10
10x10x10x10
10x10x10x10
10x10x10x10
10x10x10x10
Protons fuse.
Voila "Let there be light."
God doesn't win very often but he never gives up.
Why bring 'God' into physics at all?
Because Einstein used that metaphor?
Since you brought up 'God' again...
***
‘Enough Already,’ Said God
by Nicholas Kristof
SEPT. 16, 2017
The famous televangelist Jim Bakker, who is preaching again on television after
a rape accusation and a prison term for financial fraud, recently warned that Christians would start an armed insurrection if President Trump were impeached.
“If it happens, there will be civil war in the United States of America,” Bakker told his television audience. “The Christians will finally come out of
the shadows, because we are going to be shut up permanently if we’re not careful.”
Afterward, I received the following transcript of a conversation between Bakker
and, er, God. It comes from a divine source.
Bakker: “Dear God, thank you for blessing me with wisdom, courage, virtue and
rugged good looks. Plus humility. Please help me raise up an army to smite the infidels trying to impeach President Trump. …”
God: “Oh, enough already!”
Bakker, trying to dive under the bed: “Who’s there? And oh, no! Fire! Fire!
There’s a fire on my bed!”
God: “It’s a burning bush.”
Bakker: “Who said that? Fire! Fire! Help!”
God: “Don’t be such a wimp: This is a smokeless burning bush. It won’t even singe your linens. So listen up. This is God.”
Bakker: “Wow, that really is a burning bush! That’s you, God? Are you anointing me to lead my people and smite our enemies? Will you give me a mighty, holy sword? I could crush all those infidels, just as if they were Amalekites.”
God: “Whoa! Remember: ‘Blessed are the peacemakers.’ I’m not into smiting these days. When you say deranged, violent things in my name, I want to
sue you for defamation. Not that I go around feeling sorry for myself, but it’s tough being the
Almighty when crazies keep running around fomenting hatred in my name.”
Bakker: “Like those God-forsaken Muslims! They don’t value human life. We should destroy them!”
God: “You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
Bakker: “You could be more respectful. And wait — are you not a Republican?”
God: “I’m nonpartisan. I just don’t like being used. I was mortified when
four out of five white evangelical Christians voted for a thrice-married liar who bragged about sexual assault — and then cited me as the reason for their votes. In polls,
white evangelicals went from the group most likely to say that personal morality mattered in politics to the group least likely to say that — in just
five years. These are values voters?”
Bakker: “I admit, Trump isn’t perfect. No man is perfect, except our Lord Jesus Christ. But Trump is pro-life.”
God: “He’s pro-life for fetuses. That’s about it.”
Bakker: “But God, you put Trump in power! So many evangelical leaders, like Robert Jeffress, have pointed out that Trump could have been elected only if that was your doing.”
God: “Don’t blame me! I endorse free will. And if Trump’s election had been my doing, I would have made sure he also won the popular vote.”
Bakker: “Pastor Paula White said the other day on my television show that since Trump’s presidency is God’s will, opposition to Trump amounts to resisting ‘the hand of God.’ ”
God: “Hmm. Did she say that when Barack Obama was serving two terms?”
Bakker: “But Trump is an instrument of Jesus. Fighting abortionists and refugees.”
God: “I wish you’d read your Bible, and not just thump it. Jesus never said
a peep about abortions or gays. And you know who was a refugee?”
Bakker: “Hitler?”
God: “How about Jesus? Jesus’s family fled King Herod’s slaughter of the innocents and found asylum in Egypt. Maybe ancient Egypt was more tolerant of refugees than Trump?”
Bakker: “But God! We people of faith are just trying to do Jesus’s will!”
God: “Jesus didn’t coddle the financiers of his day, the money-changers, but hounded them while comforting the needy. Follow him, and the focus would be
on: ‘I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I
was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not give me clothing, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Nuns and missionaries
make me proud when they fight AIDS or tutor in prisons. I love World Vision’s
humanitarian programs.
But I’m just insulted when people invoke my name and side with bigots or hurt the poor.”
Bakker: “It’s more complicated than that. If today’s foreigners spoke English and were good white Christians like Joseph and Mary, I’d welcome them. But they speak strange languages. If English was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for
everyone in America.”
God: “Eloi, eloi, lema sabachthani.”
Bakker: “God, will you send your flesh and blood again on Earth so that we can exalt him?”
God: “Her. You see, I did. She’s a 16-year-old Syrian Muslim girl in Arkansas. But ICE just arrested her and deported her to a refugee camp in Turkey.”
Bakker: “Uh-oh.”
***
Shall I compare thee to a Trump?
Well, perhaps not. But I would like to invite you to submit entries to a new poetry contest meant to capture the ethos of our times in verse. And if you can
make us feel better, or laugh, or think more deeply, so much the better.
Why poetry? So many trees have died to fuel debates about our president — and
after all this time, it’s not clear how much there is to say that is new. So let’s try to examine this historical moment through a new prism, and I hope to publish the
winners in my column in the fall.
Over the years I’ve occasionally held poetry contests, inviting readers to submit their own poems about the Iraq war, about race and so on, and early this
year I held a contest for Trump poems. The result was a torrent of submissions that led to
publication of a book of such poems, “Resistance, Rebellion, Life: 50 Poems Now.” I can’t promise that a book will come out of this second contest, but
I have found a classy partner: The Poetry Society of America, the oldest poetry
organization in
the country. The Poetry Society will review entries and select finalists; a huge thanks to the society and its executive director, Alice Quinn.
My column is only 800 words, and I plan to weave in bits of several different poems, so there’s an advantage to shorter entries. No entry can be more than 22 lines. They can rhyme or not and can be haiku or sonnets or limericks or any
other form —
just no epics.
One caution: The Times can’t publish vulgarities and profanities. The poems must be your work, and your submission means that you agree to let me publish them or excerpt them in The Times. Also, I’d like to make clear that whatever
my politics, I
welcome poems that defend President Trump or target the press. If you think we in the media are being unfair to a great president, rise to his defense in verse.
I plan to keep the contest open until Oct. 8, but don’t procrastinate. Each person can enter up to three poems. To enter, email your poems to
contest@poetrysociety.org.
***
And Jesus Said Unto Paul of Ryan ...
by Nicholas Kristof
MARCH 16, 2017
A woman who had been bleeding for 12 years came up behind Jesus and touched his
clothes in hope of a cure. Jesus turned to her and said: “Fear not. Because of your faith, you are now healed.”
Then spoke Pious Paul of Ryan: “But teacher, is that wise? When you cure her,
she learns dependency. Then the poor won’t take care of themselves, knowing that you’ll always bail them out! You must teach them personal responsibility!”
They were interrupted by 10 lepers who stood at a distance and shouted, “Jesus, have pity on us.”
“NO!” shouted Pious Paul. “Jesus! You don’t have time. We have a cocktail party fund-raiser in the temple. And don’t worry about them — they’ve already got health care access.”
Jesus turned to Pious Paul, puzzled.
“Why, they can pray for a cure,” Pious Paul explained. “I call that universal health care access.”
Jesus turned to the 10 lepers. “Rise and go,” he told them. “Your faith has made you well.” Then he turned back to Pious Paul, saying, “Let me tell
you the story of the good Samaritan.
“A man was attacked by robbers who stripped him of clothes, beat him and left
him half dead. A minister passed down this same road, and when he saw the injured man, he crossed to the other side and hurried on. So did a rich man who
claimed to serve God.
But then a despised Samaritan came by and took pity on the injured man. He bandaged his wounds and put the man on his own donkey and paid an innkeeper to nurse him to health. So which of these three should we follow?”
“Those who had mercy on him,” Pious Paul said promptly.
Jesus nodded. “So go ——”
“I mean the first two,” Pious Paul interjected. “For the Samaritan’s work is unsustainable and sends the wrong message. It teaches travelers to take
dangerous roads, knowing that others will rescue them from self-destructive behaviors. This
Samaritan also seems to think it right to redistribute money from those who are
successful and give it to losers. That’s socialism! Meanwhile, if the rich man keeps his money, he can invest it and create jobs. So it’s an act of mercy for the rich man
to hurry on and ignore the robbery victim.”
“How hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of Heaven,” Jesus mused to himself. “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter heaven.”
“Let me teach you about love, Jesus — tough love!” Pious Paul explained. “You need a sustainable pro-business model. And you need to give people freedom, Jesus, the freedom to suffer misery and poverty.”
“The Lord God has anointed me to bring good news to the poor,” Jesus replied, emphasizing the last two words. Then he turned to a paralyzed beggar at his feet. “Stand up!” Jesus told the man. “Pick up your mat and go home.” As the man danced
about joyfully, Pious Paul rolled his eyes dismissively.
“Look, Jesus, you have rare talent, and it should be rewarded,” Pious Paul said. “I have a partner, The Donald, who would like to work with you: He’d set up a lovely hospital, and the rich would come and pay for you to heal them.
You’d get a
percentage, and it’d be a real money-spinner. Overhead would be minimal because every morning you could multiply some loaves and fishes. You could strike it rich!”
“Blessed are the poor, for theirs is the kingdom of God,” Jesus said. “But woe to you who are rich, for you have already received comfort.”
“Oh, come on, Jesus,” Pious Paul protested. “Don’t go socialist on me again. Please don’t encourage class warfare. The best way to help the needy is to give public money to the rich. That then inspires the poor to work harder, galvanizes the
sick to become healthy, forces the lepers to solve their own problems rather than kick back and depend on others. That’s why any realistic health plan has
to focus on providing less coverage for the poor, and big tax benefits for the rich. When
millions of people lose health care, that’s when a country is great again!”
“From everyone who has been given much,” Jesus told him, “much will be required.”
“Well, sure, this hospital would have a foundation to do some charity work. Maybe commissioning portraits of The Donald to hang in the entrance. But let’s drop this bleeding heart nonsense about health care as a human right, and see it as a financial
opportunity to reward investors. In this partnership, 62 percent of the benefits would go to the top 0.6 percent — perfect for a health care plan.”
Jesus turned to Pious Paul on his left and said: “Be gone! For I was hungry and you gave me no food; I was thirsty, and you gave me no drink; and I was sick, and you did not help me.”
“But, Lord,” protested Pious Paul of Ryan, “when did I see you hungry or thirsty or sick and refuse to help you? I drop your name everywhere. And I’m pro-life!”
“Truly, I say to you,” Jesus responded, “as you did not help the homeless, the sick — as you did not help the least of these, you did not help
me.”
***
We see front-page pictures of Trump praying, surrounded by bunches
of other praying douche-bags. But no one could be further from what
the Christian religion actually teaches than these people and the
genuinely heartless political policies they adhere to.
Now me, I take another approach altogether. I think all the religious
angles are pure crap. Yet even I cannot resist the urge to point out
just how unbelievably hypocritical these people are. It's bizarre...
I am tempted to suspect that it's because they ARE religious that
they are so damned delusional, and so cruel and hypocritical.
If religion teaches them anything, maybe it's that real evidence
doesn't even matter, and perhaps the only thing that does is belief
and ideology? That may be why and how they are leading everyone...
into the ditch.
--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: www.darkrealms.ca (1:229/2)