So Lilli and I concocted this extravagant plan to
get her lots of miles for cheap, which involved me
getting lots of miles for expensive, but whatever.

UA2165 BOS EWR 0810 0930 739 3F

The scheme started off in Boston, where the upgrade on
the first leg turned out to be free and easy though
insignificant. I got a Buffalo Trace on the rocks for
breakfast, which inspired my seatmate to get a Bloody.
Cranberry-blueberry muffins, pretty standard.

Lots of bumps getting into Newark; it always amazes me
that there aren't lots of accidents on approach at this
godforsaken airport. We got in more or less on time, so
getting to my next flight - about as far as one can
walk within one terminal - was a relative piece of cake.

UA 663 EWR IAH 1030 1328 738 21C

I was #1 on the list for upgrades. I didn't get one.
It was an okay flight, but I continue to be amazed by
the ability of the airlines to get $4 for a sub-3-oz
package of Pringles (for normal people; I continue to
get my whisk(e)y and snacks for free).

As usual, when I don't need or want an early arrival, I
get it. So I whiled away lots of time at the small and
renovated to be uglier than ever A-terminal club before
Lilli's flight got in. I made friends with Camelot Pinot
Noir for some hours, having gotten tired of my friend
Evan Williams, before limping across the terminal to the
American area, which is tucked off in a corner away from
prying eyes.

Lilli was hungry and thirsty, so we made our way to the
Centurion Lounge, where the waiter was confused by Lilli,
who looks sort of like Bonnie but not really, so he
confined his communications to me.

Remy VSOP was harsher than usual but okay with the hearty
Justin Yu fare: braised beef that was decent except for
the big clots of fat that one encountered here and there
and which, of course, I sought out, clogging the buffet
line as well as my arteries; spicy corn on the cob with
aioli and jalapenos; chickpea egg curry; and some kind of
beets (as if!). Lilli had a glass or two of Malbec.

As we were too lazy to head downtown, there was a Homewood
with a shuttle to camp out in. Unfortunately, Lilli had
forgotten her phone (no Word Connect to smooth the dull
moments), and this poor-people-unfriendly airport doesn't
have hotel desks or shuttle-summoning phones, and we had to
ask around until a friendly United employee called the hotel.
Eventually someone came by to fetch us.

We were given a nice suite, which we didn't really have time
to appreciate, as we were both pretty tired.
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